A dinosaur being delivered to the Boston Museum of Science. 1984
(h/t to twitter.com/history_pics)
once a girl in my biology class asked if the sun had bones
Once a girl in my spanish class asked if fish was a dairy product
once a girl in my biology class exclaimed, “i didn’t know you breathed when you were sleeping!”
Once a guy in my health class argued with the teacher for an entire period that peanut butter was a meat
One time a girl I know asked if Germany was an island.
Once a girl in my history class asked who won the civil war. Her friend answered “America, stupid.”
Once a girl in my history class asked if America “just forgave Japan for bombing Pearl Harbor”
I don’t care what anyone says, brilliance is sexy. Intelligence is sexy. Maturity is sexy. Having a mentally stimulating conversation is sexy. Having a great body is good, being fit is great, health is important. Charm is nice. But intelligence, my God, intelligence is absolutely sexy.
“ We are the girls with anxiety disorders, filled appointment books, five-year plans. We take ourselves very, very seriously. We are the peacemakers, the do-gooders, the givers, the savers. We are on time, overly prepared, well read, and witty, intellectually curious, always moving … We pride ourselves on getting as little sleep as possible and thrive on self-deprivation. We drink coffee, a lot of it. We are on birth control, Prozac, and multivitamins … We are relentless, judgmental with ourselves, and forgiving to others. We never want to be as passive-aggressive are our mothers, never want to marry men as uninspired as our fathers … We are the daughters of the feminists who said, “You can be anything,” and we heard, “You have to be everything. ”
have u ever quoted spongebob to someone and they didnt get it and they just looked at u and u felt like everything was pointless
if i ever have kids instead of being like “it’s a boy” im going to send out highly bewildering cards that say things like “it’s the chosen one” and “it’s probably not a lizard” and “we’re not sure what it is, but it just set the couch on fire, please send help” with a different thing to every person i send one to just to see what people show up at the baby shower with
this is the best ideA
baby showers in Night Vale
Guys, btw, this is an actual insult
if he calls your mother a hamster, it indicates that she is a fast-breeding rodent— you can get the insult there
and if he says your father smelt of elderberries, well, wine was primarily made from elderberries in the time of king arthur. he’s calling his dad a drunk
more you know
Fun fact: when he refers to the “seeelly Eenglish kerniggets” - the pronunciation of knight would have approximated that in middle English. He’s not just doing a stupid voice, he’s mocking the “bastardised” language that was a hybrid of the Normans and Saxons.
Monty Python: making jokes on eight levels all the damn time.